During this time of year, I start to think back to my winter holidays growing up. I remember the anticipation I felt as soon as December started as I looked forward to the end of the semester. Back then, it felt like we had at least a month away from school and my days were spent playing with my cousins and visiting family who lived far away. My parents always got me that perfect gift and we ate far too much food.
At a training a few weeks ago though, I was reminded that some of the students we mentor may not have the same experience I did. Some students celebrate Hanukkah. Other students don't celebrate any religious holidays. Some students may have never traveled outside of Austin while others may only get a full meal at school.
While this could turn into a sensitive or uncomfortable conversation with your student, it is more likely that this can be another way to get to know your student better. As in all conversations, it is very important not to make assumptions about your student. For many students, mentors provide the only opportunity to express themselves openly and honestly without fear of criticism so it is important that we ask questions when we don't know the answer.
Try starting your conversations by talking about things you know to be true. You know that your student will not be at school for two weeks. Instead of asking your student "What are you doing for Christmas?" you can say "How will you be spending your time away from school?"
You can also take a minute to consider what you already know about your student.
Religious Beliefs:
Has your student talked to you about going to church? What kind of church?
It is okay to talk with your students about your own religious beliefs, but make sure you allow them to discuss their beliefs as well. This should be a time to share new information in order to get to know each other better.
Also, remember that many people celebrate Christmas without necessarily adhering to a particular religious belief. If your student talks about Christmas, you can ask what they do to celebrate to understand the association they have with the holiday.
Family Situation:
What do you know about your student's family? How many brothers and sisters does your student have? Who is their primary guardian? Has there been any significant event that has recently affected their family life - death, deployment, incarceration, etc?
For some people, the holidays are all about big family events and socializing with friends. For others, it is a time to spend quietly at home with your immediate family.
If you know that your student has a significant financial need in their family, take this into consideration before asking them what they asked from Santa Clause.
The goal of mentoring is to be able to develop a friendship with your students. No matter what your age, it takes awhile to really get to know someone and each time you visit your student you are probably learning something new. Take this opportunity over the holidays to ask questions about what your student does outside of school and find out what other interests they may have.
I hope you all have a safe and relaxing holiday!
Monday, December 1, 2008
Thursday, October 30, 2008
reunited.. & it feels so good!
So it has been quite awhile (over 2 months!) since the first APIE Mentor post. September and October were extremely busy as we worked to get returning mentors started again and trained new mentors as well as new Mentor Contacts for the schools. In the last two months, we have trained over 125 new mentors and have over 800 registered mentors! The Mentor Contacts have been working hard to quickly match mentors with students and we have seen some really amazing reunions between mentors and students.
The first story is from a mentor who started his second year with the program in September. I was so impressed by the activities he is doing with his student. I definitely could not make a hovercraft in elementary school.. or in college!
"I am returning as a mentor this year at two schools. The boy I mentored last year at one school is now a 5th grader and we’re scheduled to meet on Monday’s. We like to work on “engineering” projects and talk about radio controlled airplanes and such. Last year we made simple hovercraft devices (balloon + CD disk + water bottle nozzle) for the class and it was a big hit. This year I think we’ll work on a people sized hovercraft!"
This story really made my day. We have been trying to reconnect this mentor and her student since last spring. They had been working together since 4th grade and the student was now entering 9th grade. We were finally able to find out which high school the student was attending and set up their first meeting at the beginning of October. The counselor said that when she asked the student if she would like to meet with her mentor again, "she was very excited. Her face really lit up when I gave her the info." For those of you who haven't worked with teenagers before, it takes a lot for them to show just how excited they really are! The mentor later reported that her first visit was wonderful. They spent the time catching up and the mentor could not believe how grown up her student had become in just one year!
Some of the best relationships develop over the course of several years, as mentors really get to know their students and have the opportunity to see them grow up before their eyes. Especially as students transition from elementary to middle school and middle school to high school, the consistency of a mentor can be very reassuring. While some students want to venture out into their new school without a mentor, it is important that they know someone cares about them and is only a phone call away.
-------------------------------------------------------
The first story is from a mentor who started his second year with the program in September. I was so impressed by the activities he is doing with his student. I definitely could not make a hovercraft in elementary school.. or in college!
"I am returning as a mentor this year at two schools. The boy I mentored last year at one school is now a 5th grader and we’re scheduled to meet on Monday’s. We like to work on “engineering” projects and talk about radio controlled airplanes and such. Last year we made simple hovercraft devices (balloon + CD disk + water bottle nozzle) for the class and it was a big hit. This year I think we’ll work on a people sized hovercraft!"
-------------------------------------------------------
This story really made my day. We have been trying to reconnect this mentor and her student since last spring. They had been working together since 4th grade and the student was now entering 9th grade. We were finally able to find out which high school the student was attending and set up their first meeting at the beginning of October. The counselor said that when she asked the student if she would like to meet with her mentor again, "she was very excited. Her face really lit up when I gave her the info." For those of you who haven't worked with teenagers before, it takes a lot for them to show just how excited they really are! The mentor later reported that her first visit was wonderful. They spent the time catching up and the mentor could not believe how grown up her student had become in just one year!
-------------------------------------------------------
Some of the best relationships develop over the course of several years, as mentors really get to know their students and have the opportunity to see them grow up before their eyes. Especially as students transition from elementary to middle school and middle school to high school, the consistency of a mentor can be very reassuring. While some students want to venture out into their new school without a mentor, it is important that they know someone cares about them and is only a phone call away.
Monday, August 25, 2008
Welcome Back Mentors!
Each week, over 1200 Austin community members meet with students from kindergarten through 12th grade. These mentors are invested in the personal and academic success of their students. Many times, the spotlights are put on the negative situations in our schools. But I am constantly hearing amazing and uplifting stories about the relationships these mentors are building with the children in Austin, and how thrilled they are to see their students grow throughout the year.
This blog is an opportunity to share these success stories with the world! My hope is that the mentors in Austin will be able to share in each other's successes, and just might encourage someone else to become a part of this growing community.
School started today and the mentors are very eager to see their students again. But before classes even began, and before I even sent out a request for submissions, I received the e-mail below from one of the sweetest mentors I know. I remember last year, I received a call from this mentor right after I sent out our monthly updates. She told me that she was concerned about something I said in my e-mail. I quickly pulled up the letter and scanned it for something that could have been interpreted the wrong way. She said "You thanked the mentors for all the hard work we've done this year. And I just wanted to let you know that I haven't done any work at all. All I've done is have fun!"
A Mentor's Testimonial
After receiving excellent training in how to be a mentor and being apprised of the many ways that mentees gain from the experience, I felt assured that I could fulfill the duties of a mentor. But, when I actually became a mentor, I was surprised and delighted that the mentee would not be the only one to gain. I, the mentor, would also benefit by becoming more knowledgeable. I learned from my mentee as well as mentoring her. She shared with me the way she ensured that she would manage to remember important things. And I was gratified by her concern for me.
We met over lunch once a week. One day she informed me, "You don't eat enough."
"Hold it, " I thought," Which one of us is the mentor?"
Just being present in the school with all its activities was energizing. I had the good luck of meeting some of the wonderful, dedicated teachers.
And the children! What a treat it was to observe children of various ethnicities and races learning, playing, and working together peacefully and enjoyably . I was inspired and became a hopeful optimist that the world could become a better place.
I also could view the displays the children made on a variety of subjects, the last one being "Oceans." I was amazed at the creativity and talent the children demonstrated. When I asked my mentee to show me what her class contributed, she took me to her classroom to see for myself : "The Seashore." While there, she proudly introduced me to her teacher and her classmates, one of whom asked her whether I was her grandmother. Naturally, she answered, "No." But I felt that in a way, we were in a family relationship.
I could go on and on about what I liked about being a mentor. But I invite you to see for yourself.
On the last day of the school term, she told me, "I'll never forget you." Priceless!
In conclusion, if you want to add excitement, meaning and value to your life, the answer if very simple, "Become a mentor." You'll be glad if you do.
This blog is an opportunity to share these success stories with the world! My hope is that the mentors in Austin will be able to share in each other's successes, and just might encourage someone else to become a part of this growing community.
School started today and the mentors are very eager to see their students again. But before classes even began, and before I even sent out a request for submissions, I received the e-mail below from one of the sweetest mentors I know. I remember last year, I received a call from this mentor right after I sent out our monthly updates. She told me that she was concerned about something I said in my e-mail. I quickly pulled up the letter and scanned it for something that could have been interpreted the wrong way. She said "You thanked the mentors for all the hard work we've done this year. And I just wanted to let you know that I haven't done any work at all. All I've done is have fun!"
A Mentor's Testimonial
After receiving excellent training in how to be a mentor and being apprised of the many ways that mentees gain from the experience, I felt assured that I could fulfill the duties of a mentor. But, when I actually became a mentor, I was surprised and delighted that the mentee would not be the only one to gain. I, the mentor, would also benefit by becoming more knowledgeable. I learned from my mentee as well as mentoring her. She shared with me the way she ensured that she would manage to remember important things. And I was gratified by her concern for me.
We met over lunch once a week. One day she informed me, "You don't eat enough."
"Hold it, " I thought," Which one of us is the mentor?"
Just being present in the school with all its activities was energizing. I had the good luck of meeting some of the wonderful, dedicated teachers.
And the children! What a treat it was to observe children of various ethnicities and races learning, playing, and working together peacefully and enjoyably . I was inspired and became a hopeful optimist that the world could become a better place.
I also could view the displays the children made on a variety of subjects, the last one being "Oceans." I was amazed at the creativity and talent the children demonstrated. When I asked my mentee to show me what her class contributed, she took me to her classroom to see for myself : "The Seashore." While there, she proudly introduced me to her teacher and her classmates, one of whom asked her whether I was her grandmother. Naturally, she answered, "No." But I felt that in a way, we were in a family relationship.
I could go on and on about what I liked about being a mentor. But I invite you to see for yourself.
On the last day of the school term, she told me, "I'll never forget you." Priceless!
In conclusion, if you want to add excitement, meaning and value to your life, the answer if very simple, "Become a mentor." You'll be glad if you do.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)